Buffalo Bloviator

 

If James Thurber had spent the past two years here in Buffalo, he would have more likely been busy daydreaming about Rick Snowden rather than working on his classic “The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty.”

What guy in Buffalo hasn’t been living vicariously through Rick Snowden? Mr. Snowden has got it all. He lives in Buffalo’s equivalent to Wayne Manor, has millions of dollars, owns the best gentleman’s club in town, and owns Hugh Hefner’s Playboy limousine. Plus he’s happily married with five kids. Rick has the best of all worlds and is pushing the envelope of the American dream.

In a surprise announcement last week, the public learned of his decision to sell his toys and move back to Las Vegas. In a live radio interview, Mr. Snowden explained his feelings of rejection. He feels that many people object to his being a proprietor of “strip clubs.”

 

In my opinion, Mr. Snowden should stay. Mr. Snowden is a family man who has demonstrated his genuine concern for civic causes. He has hosted lavish parties at his mansion raising tens of thousands of dollars for good causes. Mr. Snowden is a good businessman and contributes to our tax base.

 

Here is my plan to keep Mr. Snowden right where he is. What guy in Buffalo wouldn’t take a chance on a raffle ticket to win a day of being Rick Snowden? That’s right. The money would go to his favorite causes, and the winner gets to enjoy everything that Mr. Snowden has for one day. 

 

Think about it. Begin your special day at the mansion. A lovely family, including five wonderful children, will see you off to work in the morning. You will be whisked to your gentleman’s club in the Playboy limousine. While in the limousine you will take care of the routine newspaper interviews and radio talk show dates. At the “shop” you will count money, entertain your friends in the lap (dance) of luxury, and keep an eye on the staff. Then, back to the mansion to entertain your dinner guests.

 

 

 Dick Cheney revels in his proximity to Rick Snowden.